Archive for February, 2007

The WhackMan Reviews: Nineteen 7

Tuesday, February 27th, 2007

Nineteen 7 is the first porn flick to have seriously pissed The WhackMan off. There?ve been others that didn?t meet even The WhackMan?s lowest of standards, but this piece of shit just robs the life outta ya.

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First up is Dawn Devine, a weird lookin? tramp who looks like she needs to fill her mouth with a nourishing meal rather than a dick. She gives a boring blowjob to some white dude, then gets fucked real boring like till her face gets blasted on. Fucking yawn?

Next up is some old bitch named Kimberly Jade whom The WhackMan can?t believe has forged a career for as long as she has. After she rubs herself down two dudes take turns filling her snatch, eventually getting to some shitty DP action. The sex is clumsy, like watching your boring neighbors fuck.

The lone bright spot is scene 3. Davia Ardell is a hot blond with a set of firm tanned canons. She and Little Sinderella get their hot lesbo lick session on in a spa, Davia at one point trying to stick one of her massive boobs up Little Sindy?s ass. They get each other off real good, allowing for the first time today for The WhackMan to get himself off. Twice.

Marie Ange bats cleanup, lying her ass off in an interview claiming that she?s 19. Yeah right. Her little boy body gets sucked and fucked by Jonathan Morgan is such a dull fashion that you wonder who the fuck would financially back these hacks.

What the fuck is this bullshit?!?!

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TrashyToons.com

Monday, February 26th, 2007

Legs spread atop a table and a stiff hard cock stuffed up her cartoon pussy. Don’t you wish you knew a real life purple haired bitch like this… TrashyToons.com is filled with wild crazy shit like this.

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FuckHerRight.com

Sunday, February 25th, 2007

Do these look good enough for ya? I’m Sophia, and I get fucked at FuckHerRight.com. Cum check me out.

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The WhackMan Reviews: Black Candy Asses 2

Saturday, February 24th, 2007

Dane Hardcore has brought The WhackMan Black Candy Asses 2 today. Now The WhackMan does love watchin? a good solid black pussy takin? a good solid blackalicious assault, but this half ass porn flick disappoints.

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First up is Vanessa, a sweet looking next door type of ebony queen that gets fucked for 0. She spits all over Cuntry?s black cock then rides it like a pro, and when she takes it doggy she queffs all over the place. Yawn.

Next up is Hypnotic and the unwieldy Charlie Mac. He and his gargantuan black sword plunge deep into of the abyss of Miss Hypnotic?s uterus, giving it the fucking she?ll most likely never forget. Powerful fucking, thought The WhackMan to himself.

Wesley Pipes and fat ass Khandi Kream are batting third. This hung brotha takes it to this porn bitch and treats her like da ho dat she is. Ms. Kream?s mother must be oh so very proud of her fat fucking daughter. You gotta check this slut out just to get a look at those implanted titties that look like they?re gonna burst any second. At the ripe old age of 20 Khandi?s career is running on fumes.

Bishop and a saggy misshapen breasted tramp named Chasity finish things off. By this point The WhackMan was not happy, not happy, but Chasity turned things around real quick because if there?s one thing she can do, it?s fuck. She fucks the living shit out Bishop and can get all rhythmic and shit in any position. Bla-mother-fucking-dow!

Bullshit Black Candy Asses 2 ain?t gonna be bringing in any awards any time soon, that’s for damn sure. The WhackMan blew 3 forgettable loads to this flick.

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MILFVixen.com

Friday, February 23rd, 2007

Wanna put your cock right here in my fucking whore mouth? I’m Vicky Vette, and I’m the goddamn motherfucking queen of the MILF’s over at MILFVixen.com. Cum and see.

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The WhackMan Reviews: Interracial Nation 2

Tuesday, February 20th, 2007

Filmco has burned The WhackMan before, but Interracial Nation 2 is a solid porn flick with some raucous fucking at times.

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Jessica Darlin gets piped first by hung brotha Darren James. After she gets her sweet tits out she goes right to sucking the black dick, then gets stuck with it and cries out in joyous ecstasy. Her voice is hard on the ears, and when she takes it up the ass it gets a shit ton worse, but when her face gets blasted on its all worth it.

Next is Katrina and Billy Banks. This bitch has gotta be the oldest looking “18 year old” working in the business, and gettin? those stars and fairies tattooed over her pussy was a dumb fucking decision, but her pudgy ass does gets pounded pretty damn good. And watch when she takes the cumshot in her whore mouth? This bitch has everything pierced!

3rd up is Olivia Saint. Mr. James is up again and after they both get their oral on he goes to work. He gives her a damn fine throttling then does some great ass fucking, at the end dropping a massive load on her bitch blond face.

Red-headed Cherry is an average looking piece who takes the black cock for the first time in her young life. Billy Banks pounds her all kinds of ways so thoroughly that her pussy farts - of which there are 3 - get progressively louder throughout the scene. But Billy doesn?t mind, he?s a professional, just like The WhackMan.

Last but not least is Cailey Taylor. It?s Darren James again and he takes it to this big fake breasted tramp like there?s no tomorrow. He violates her all kinds of ways and she loves it all, moaning like an animal the entire time.

Big black cocks taking it to tight little white pussies. Nice job Filmco. The WhackMan had lots of fun whacking to Interracial Nation 2.

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Monday, February 19th, 2007

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Saturday, February 17th, 2007

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Thursday, February 8th, 2007
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Tuesday, February 6th, 2007

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